How I Love Living in a Small Town, OR, Adventures in Movie-Going

My friend Elizabeth came up yesterday from the "big city" so we could go to a movie together. We've been trying to arrange this pretty much since I got back to KS in September. I chose for us to go to Mac rather than Newton or Hutch because Underworld started later there, plus it was closer. The theater in Mac is basically a storefront with on-the-street parking rather than a parking lot. So E -- who hasn't driven a van in many, MANY moons -- wouldn't have to back out on to Main Street after the movie, I advised her to go up a half a block and park in the USD office lot. We got to see the entire movie in a private showing because we're so special -- i.e., we were the first ones (and the only ones) to show up to see that showing, and being a small-town theater, they didn't start it until someone showed up to see it, even if they WERE late.

After the movie (it was about 6:15 or so), we walked calmly back to the USD office and got in the van. We truly WERE calm because we'd been lulled into sleepiness by the dark theater. Yeah, I know -- we're party animals. I noticed a janitor cleaning the office windows -- he glanced at us and then walked into the building. After a couple of minutes of trying to turn on the headlights (Mom has never clearly explained to me where the switch is so I can tell others) and THOROUGHLY cleaning my windshield in the process (oops, wrong one), we sedately pulled out of the lot and head back toward my house. E was carefully watching the speed limit signs because Heaven knows you DO NOT want to get stopped by a cop in a small town.

We had just cleared the downtown business area when we noticed flashing lights in the rearview mirrors.

What was I just saying about getting stopped by a cop in a small town?

We pulled over and started quizzing each other while waiting for the cop to approach.

Me: "Did we run a red light?"

E: "I don't think so."

Me: "Well you sure weren't speeding."

E: "Nnnnoooooo."

The nice young policeman walked up then.

Officer F: "The reason I pulled you over . . . . You know that parking lot you were in back there?"

E and me: "Yes."

Officer F: "Well, the janitor called and reported that you looked suspicious."

We explained to the nice young occifer why we were parked there, and he said OK but he needs to check E's license anyway. As he is doing so, we started laughing.

E: "Well, you do know, of course, that serial killers typically drive big white vans."

Me: "Yes, but do they typically have vanity plates on their vans?"

E: "You have a vanity plate? What does it say?"

Me: "Killer8." ::much laughing:: "No, not really. By the way, you don't have any bench warrants, do you?"

E: "I don't think so, but I guess we'll find out."

She didn't, and we were allowed to continue on our way. E said, to give the guy credit, he DID seem a bit embarassed to pull us over. ::snort:: He just doesn't know what a 5'2" woman and gimp can do on a good day, now does he?

Mom and Dad laughed about it when we told them, and Mom told me later she was going to have to restrict my going out with friends if we couldn't control our rabble rousing. ::grin:: If she only knew . . . .

Well, the more Dad thought about it, the more irritated he got. So this morning he'd worked himself up and called the USD office on the way to his doctor's appointments. Neither the superintendent nor his/her assistant was there (what'd he expect -- he was calling at just after 8 am), but he did talk to the person who was "in charge" of the janitor. When he opened with, "I have a complaint about your janitor," the guy replied, "Oh man, not again."

Truly, I tried to talk Dad out of calling, but he said, "No, that's just ridiculous. You're in a wheelchair and Elizabeth looks like she's about 80 pounds. Just how threatening could you guys have looked? It was harassment, pure and simple." Oh well. That's my protective Daddy.

NOLA pics

One of these days, I'll figure out how to get these to post in the order I want them!





This is my goofy pal Erica. On her way to my apartment one Sunday afternoon to help me use the bathroom and make supper, she cut across campus via a different route on her bike and happened across some Indian students having a festival at the amphitheater. She stopped to listen to the music, and a little boy invited her in. Next thing she knew, she had pink powder on her face!

I doubt that she'll be returning to NOLA because all she has left to complete her masters in public health is her internship. That she'll be doing either in Mexico or Central America (most likely the former) because her interests lie with Latino communities. I'll miss her because she was the one person I could always count on for a laugh. She always knows how to cheer me up.

She's also the only person who has ever gotten me to dance in a club. She talked me into salsa dancing with her at the Blue Nile when we took out my next door neighbor before he moved to Chicago. Yeah, she's crazy like that -- and no, I hadn't been drinking!

Here is a great shot taken by my pal Natalie (you'll meet her in a minute) of one of the many mimosa trees by the Liberal Arts building on campus. There's a giant yard on the North side of the building that is nothing but mimosa and magnolia trees. It's beautiful when they're all in bloom (about April and May), and the energy of the trees is phenomenal. I shudder to think what happened to them in the hurricane.

This is my pal Melissa. She was a masters student in the bio department and had the desk next to mine. We shared an office for about four or five months before we finally became friends. Part of it was our conflicting schedules, part of it was me taking forever to warm up to new people -- we all KNOW how I am. We discovered we had a lot in common, especially our life philosophies. She is also the person who introduced me to sushi.

In this pic, Erica, Natalie, Natalie's man at that time, and I were having an end-of-the-semester barbecue. Melissa stopped by but couldn't attend because she was getting ready to move back to Pennsylvania. She'd had it with her thesis advisor and was taking a job with a pharmaceutical company back home. She's much happier, but I miss her terribly.

This is a crepe myrtle. These lovely trees come with blooms from white to lilac (seen here) to deep purple to pale pink to magenta. They remind me of lilacs though they don't have a scent. This particular specimen grows in front of the apartment building next door to mine (you can see the end of my building behind the pine tree on the left). Two lilac-colored crepe myrtles grow in front of my building, but they hadn't fully bloomed at the time of this photo because they faced the West.

And here is Natalie. She is the third of my best pals I've made in NOLA (Erica and 'Lissa being the other two). Natalie is the one I counted on to be brutally honest. When I had a major shot dealt to my self-esteem, Natalie was the first one I told. Like a good friend, she listened sympathetically, asking questions to be sure she understood what I was feeling but generally lending an ear. Then, also like a good friend, she said, "OK, you've taken a blow to your ego. What are you going to do about it?"

Natalie now lives in NYC attending Columbia for a double masters in public health and social work. Also, interestingly, now she's dating a boy from Kansas. I laughed when she told me that. I'm happy for her, but I miss her terribly as well.

Some pictures

This is the dreamcatcher my "niece" Jamie and my "sister" Frances made me for my birthday. I got it after Christmas because "you were far away on your birthday, Aunty Dawn." I love that the webbing makes a star in the center. When Mom was hanging it, Jamie told me that she has a dreamcatcher, too. Mom asked her if she knew who had made it, and she shrugged. Her eyes got huge when I told her I made it for her when she was a little baby (she's four now). "You made my dreamcatcher, Aunty Dawn? Now *I* made one for *you*!"





Here are the "snugglin' boys" -- Rebel in the background, Rommel in the fore. Can you believe Rommel isn't even a year old yet?

Yes, that's my Reba girl all cocooned in my old baby blanket. She gets chilly after having her hair cut (which she did yesterday), so Mom covers her up -- usually only when we go to bed, but Mom decided Reba might want to take a nap while I had a bathroom break this afternoon. Personally, I think Mom just spoils the dog!

This pic is for Lynlee. A few months ago, L had a "guess how many full skeins of yarn I have" contest, and I won third place. The prize was yarn. Some of my loot was Lion Brand Watercolors yarn, and Mom and I decided to make my eight-year-old second cousin Selena a poncho because she LOOOOVES pink -- and I thought she'd look great in this hot pink (she has beautiful skin thanks to her Hispanic daddy). Rather than crocheting the tie like the instructions said, we decided to thread some coordinating turquoise ribbon through the neck. The poncho was a massive hit with Selena.

Well, this has been fun, but dial-up takes forever to upload the pics. I'll try to post more tomorrow. Have some pics of my pals in NOLA I'd like to share.

Meme

Four Jobs You Have Had In Your Life
1. Student assistant in counseling office at Hutch JUCO and at WSU admissions.
2. Freshman advisor for WSU housing
3. Graduate assistant
4. Academic instructor for UBMS and for bio

Four Movies You Could Watch Over and Over
1. Harry Potters
2. LOTRs
3. Jurassic Park -- Jeff Goldblum in black -- hubba hubba!
4. Sense and Sensibility -- Alan Rickman, baby!

Four Places You Have Lived
1. Trimley St. Martin, England
2. Barksdale AFB, Shreveport, LA
3. Buhler, KS
4. NOLA

Four TV Shows You Love(d) to Watch
1. MacGyver
2. Both Stargates
3. The Sentinel -- IT'S COMING OUT ON DVD!!!!!
4. Numb3rs

Four Places You Have Been on Vacation
1-4. What's a vacation?

Four Places You Want to Visit
1. Scotland
2. Greece
3. Africa (anywhere)
4. Germany

Four Websites You Visit Daily
1. My LJ friends page
2. Lynlee
3. Elizabeth
4. My UNO email for more FEMA updates

Four of Your Favorite Foods
1. Dad's chili
2. Mom's meatloaf
3. Naomi's chicken burritos
4. My shrimp/chicken/catfish/some-combo-of-those creole

Four Things Currently on the Floor in Your Car
1-4. Leaves that were stuck to my tires (I'm anal about keeping my van clean, but I haven't gotten around to getting the leaves vacuumed out yet)

Four Bloggers You are Tagging
1. E
2. Gina
3. Stacie
4. Amanda

Five years ago

Five years ago yesterday, something happened that I thought wouldn't happen for thirty or forty more years at least. Even then, I thought for sure it would happen to me first.

My younger sister died.

Some people say when you have a tragedy of that magnitude happen that everything blurs together and the trauma causes your brain to lock away details as a mode of self-protection.

I and my brain are not normal.

I remember nearly every detail of that day from the moment my brother called to tell me to the moment I went to bed that night. I remember vividly the way all my breath just disappeared -- not in a rush, but just like it vanished. Poof, gone. I remember the confusion I felt that no one knew what had happened. I mean, a 27-year-old doesn't just die for no reason. I remember the sick feeling I got in my stomach when I had to tell my mother. I remember choking on the phone as I told Lady and being amazed when she and Mouse dropped everything to come stay the night with me. I remember fielding a million phone calls on my house phone and my cell phone -- all with Mouse's and Lady's help, thank the Higher. I remember nearly losing it as I listened to my cousin Jimmy crying over the phone -- those side-hitching sobs of the truly heart-broken. I remember asking M and L to get me the hell out of my apartment at about ten that night. I remember buying a Stacy-appropriate blouse to wear to the funeral. I remember getting home and falling completely apart in M's and L's arms -- nearly ten hours after I first got the news -- with those same side-hitching sobs I'd heard from my cousin. I remember thinking that their holding me was the only thing keeping me together, that if not for them, I would have fallen into a pile of sorrow and anger with absolutely no physical form any more. I remember wanting to burst apart with the sorrow and anger, but they just wouldn't let me. And I remember in the middle of the crying, my sister ringing my fish chimes to tell me she was all right, that I would be all right.

Five years ago, my sister died. I thought I was going to die from all the things left unsaid and the hurt.

Obviously, I didn't die, and I think in the ensuing five years I've learned a lot of lessons from my sister's living and dying. I've accepted that she had accomplished the task she had been put here in this life to do, and I've accepted that no matter how much I want to, I may never know what that task was. I've learned that life is too short to hold back on how you feel -- whether you are holding back hurt, anger, and frustration or peace, happiness, and love. Doesn't mean I don't still hold back on some things, though. I've learned I shouldn't, but I'm still learning how to not. I've learned that my sister and I had come to some kind of understanding about our different personalities. I've learned that despite our differences, we loved each other as much as two sisters can. I've learned to fight for what you really believe in. I've learned to never compromise yourself.

Some of these things I learned directly from an examination of my sister's life. Others I've learned from an examination of myself since her death.

And I'm still learning.